Of Two Minds
I have to be quick tonight because I’m running late and only have fifteen minutes to write.
I’m running late because a ridiculous number of incidents occured resulting in me not leaving work until 5 (I start at 7), coming home, eating dinner, then talking to my mom on the phone for an hour and a half…
Which is fine…
But it messed up my whole evening schedule.
So, I asked Sir to exempt me from my writing tonight (he’s in lockdown over our routines lately after me freaking out so thoroughly – and it’s been helping… but still…)
He contemplated it because… I have good reasons. I had a hell day, after a hell week, after a hell month, of really a hell school year. Some classes are just hell.
My evening was screwed up both by coming home late and by talking to my mom.
I’m exhausted.
I just want to go to bed (it’s not like I asked to stay up and binge-watch Donuts around America or something…)
He ultimately said no because our routines are really important right now and relaxing them, even for “good reasons” will ultimately weaken the healthy benefit of them.
But really? For just ONE night? It’s not like it’s a slippery slope. He can be ultra strict tomorrow and we’ll be on track again…
But at the same time, I get it. I know he’s right. I know it as a teacher… I know that the absolute WORST thing when kids are already wiley is to mess with the routines, even for “good reasons” – hello field trip, five assemblies, and field day in the last three weeks of school…
But… it’s just fifteen minutes. For one night.
Unhealthy brain wants to go off about how if I were a “real adult” or how “real adults” handle their lives without someone telling them what to do…Â But… really… I’m over unhealthy brain right now.
I’m what I am. I choose this relationship because this is how I keep my life organized. Other people its Tupperware and label-makers. So… whatever.
I just told Sir our relationship is like Tupperware and a label-maker. He’s so calm, he just said, “Okay.” I’m sure he figures it will make sense when he reads this later. Sub brother is totally nodding, though.
I’m not sure if he is thinking the same thing I’m thinking, but I find the possibility hilarious.
Sub brains think alike.
