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Moments with Sir – Ownership
This is something I wrote for the list I run… I don’t think I ever published it here. Â I think I intended to, but just never felt motivated enough to “clean it up” and make it more neat and tidy for this posting. Then I was talking with my friend S, and telling her about it and I realized I never had shared it here (and thus she hadn’t read it, obviously) and that… it actually illuminates a complicated to explain aspect of my relationship with Sir. Â I don’t know if this will uncomplicate it, but it will, hopefully, demonstrate it… Or not… Â Meh. Â I’m not going to bother cleaning…
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Saving the shit…
Things have been going rapidly to fertilizer around these parts. Â I’m losing my shit. Â Sub brother got horribly sick (like in bed for ten days) and barely back on his feet and behind at work… and losing his shit.
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Communication
My eating restrictions have abruptly taken a turn towards severe depression and apathy and lack of eating…  Sir sent me to the store on the way home to buy “anything you want to eat, fuck the carbs.”  Once at the store I found this a difficult proposition. This was Sir’s response. We communicate so well… Of course, this is ALL I’ve eaten tonight…  He doesn’t know that, yet. Yay, depression.
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Unfucking
I was told to write about my day.  I’m nervous about that because… because now S is reading and she’ll KNOW stuff!  😀  But I guess she signed on for that when she stuck around all those years ago after I “came out” about who I am.  And I guess she signed on for that when she wanted to read this blog, so… Sorry S!  You can totally cover your eyes if you want to… Today was Unfucking day.  It’s not as exciting (nor as kinky) as it sounds…  A while back we found an app called UFYH which stands for Un-Fuck Your Habitat.  Sir fell instantly in love.  I…
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Yes, Sir
I just got back from my workout (walking for a mile). Sir went with me despite the fact that he already did his run earlier this morning. I have been working up to walking this far ever since the pneumonia and the asthma (which followed the pneumonia just to be sure I could NEVER breathe again…). It’s been discouraging and disheartening. I’ve had times when I wanted to give up and let myself become progressively more out of shape, become a 600 pound woman and exist only to eat. I’ve been embarrassed (walking 100 feet and panting out of breath) feeling that the rest of the world was looking at…
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Differences
This is an exploration of some of the events in my previous post – Punishment. If you haven’t read it, be aware that this may reference disturbing concepts or events, please read at your own comfort level.
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Punishment
WARNING: This post is graphic and discusses S/M and D/s punishment that could be upsetting for some readers. Please read only according to your own comfort level, and know that all activities are engaged in with consent and have built to this level of intensity through a lengthy and intimate building of trust between my Sir and myself.
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Being Sick with Sir…
So… I managed to get a summer pneumonia, how stupid is that? Â Sir took today off work to stay home and take care of me, which is sweet, as long as I don’t punch him…
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Moments with Sir
Me: (curled up on the couch whimpering) Don’t yell at me, I’m in pain! Sir: (breathes deeply as if he can suck patience from the air) Let’s try this again. What hurts? Me: Everything! Sir: That is NOT informative!
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Sunday Night Thoughts
This is such a crap blog (I just typoed that as “carp”). Â I always think about how crappy it is… my posts aren’t thematic or pointed or even on topic beyond “Sunday Night Thoughts.” Â Wow, Shadow, stunning work, really. Â I have no idea why people even come here anymore.
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